We all want to be great in bed. We want to have a good time and we want our fuck buddy or whomever we have hooked up with to have a good time as well. The thing we definitely want is for our fuck buddy to think that we are amazing in bed. As humans, from a young age, we have been taught to seek approval. Most of us wanted our parents to be proud of us. As kids we were taught that our teachers were the ones that gave us grades, marks and generally made judgements about our worth, so we became seekers of their approval. Even at work, most of us have bosses that give us appraisals or decide if we are going to get pay rises or promotions, again all of which mean we continue to seek approval from others. The same is true in bed.
We cannot help but want the person that we are sleeping with to want more of the same, to want us again and again (and again!). We seek that approval (and we seek it often without evening being aware that we crave it so). So how can we really be sure that we are going to get it, that we are going to rock the world of the person that we are with? There are many steps that can be taken, but one is to learn to cold read your fuck buddy.
Cold reading is the art of reading someone’s body language to know what they are thinking or what action they are about to take without them saying words to that effect. It is most commonly known in poker, where you try and “read” your opponent to know when they are telling the truth or when they are lying. In this case, it is about reading your fuck buddy so that you know what they like and what they don’t like. It is really quite simple as well!
Sometimes your fuck buddy will use their words and just tell you what feels good. When they do that, listen and do more of whatever it is you are doing. Other times they don’t and this is when you really pay attention. When you stoke them somewhere, do they pull away (indicating they don’t like it) or do they lean in? Does their body shiver with pleasure or stiffen in stress? If you can be sensitive to this, you can adjust your approach accordingly.
Listen to their breath as well. As they breathe faster, shallower breaths they are getting more and more excited. When that changes, be mindful of what you are doing so you can quickly learn what it is that is turning them on and off.
By simply listening in this way, you will find your fuck buddy will keep coming back again and again as they have the best time in bed with you.