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Get good at sex – top three tasks

EdBennett — Thu, 17 May 2018 09:52:31 +0000

17 May 2018 - 10:52 | Tags: good in bed, good sex guide

There are certain things in life that we learn naturally without making effort in order to achieve them. No one really remembers having to try to learn to walk, or talk, but these are complex actions that require a lot of learning and co-ordination, yet we do them without thinking about them, and without considering the effort that went into the task of getting good at them.
Other things have to be learnt, but some people are naturals in different areas. Some people are naturally skilled at dancing or working with their bodies. Other people are naturally brainy, and do very well with tasks that require academic ability. Some people seem to always know where they can make the least effort and still get the highest reward… and this is a skill in itself!
Sex is something that should come naturally to us. It is hardcoded into our brains and our bodies, we have been doing it for thousands of years and who knows how many generations. I think that our bodies really do know what they want to do, and for the most part we can be guided by that, we should be guided by that. However, even the most “naturals” at something require a little practice to get good at whatever it is that they are doing.

The more sex that you have, the better you will get at it. It really is as simple as that. To good at driving, the more hours behind the wheel the better. The same is true for sex. The more hours that you spend having sex, the better you will get. There is no replacement for this.
However, there are ancillary tasks that you can do in order to help you be a better driver that you can do without being behind a wheel, such as studying the highway code, or reading up common mistakes, or even driving simulators on a computer. There are also things you can do to make you better in bed, that happen outside of the bedroom. Here are my top three tasks.

Kegel exercises

These are muscle strengthening exercises that work out the “sex” muscles. It is easy to do, I think everyone should be doing these. Healthy too!

Eating healthier

General health affects your sex drive and ability. Staying healthy makes a big difference to this, so try it!

Sleeping

Being tired is a sex killer. The more rested you are, the better you can perform. It really is as simple as that.

Remember, being better at sex is not only about being better for your partner. You will have a better time of it as well.

Kegel exercises for men: better sex guide

EdBennett — Sun, 13 Mar 2016 21:24:52 +0000

13 Mar 2016 - 21:24 | Tags: better sex guide, good sex guide, improved sex

So you have heard of something called a Kegel exercise. You know a little about it, but not a lot. Your mate told you that it can make you better in bed. He probably said something like “it’ll make you a god damn sexual tyrannosaurus”. You were sceptical, but you decided to look it up anyway. Well fear not, I am about to tell you everything you could want to know about Kegel exercises.

What are Kegel exercises?

A Kegel exercise is an exercise where you consciously contract then relax your pelvic floor muscles. Repetition of this movement is like a press up, pull up, squat or any other type of muscle exercise. The use of the muscle causes it to grow over time. It becomes stronger and more toned, leaving you in a position where any use of the pelvic floor muscle can be done both harder and with greater control. Remember those two we are going to come back to that:

Harder
Greater control

How does this relate to sex?

What on earth do your pelvic floor muscles have to do with sex? Put simply, when you come those are the muscles that are used. When you ejaculate your pelvic floor muscles contract and play a key role. So the harder your pelvic floor muscles, the harder you will come (see I told you we would come back to that! You didn’t have to wait long at all either, did you now?!). There are people on the internet who claim that after 3 months of hard core kegel exercises they were able to shoot their cum across a room! Now I don’t know the truth of the individuals saying this, but theoretically this is possible! So you wanna come harder? Do Kegels.

Control your Kegels, Control your Come

When you come your muscles have to contract – this means that if you stop of muscles from contracting you won’t come... control your kegels and you control your come! Being able to come on command (and not before) is a skill few learn, and one that will make you a god in bed! It takes work, but the path is laid out. Just get on the Kegel exercises and you will be in a position to start to try and do it with a possibility of success.

Finding your Kegel

So you are sold on the reasons and you can’t wait to go. Where are your Kegels you ask? Easy. Go for a piss. As you are peeing stop your wee mid stream. You know those muscles you just clenched in order to stop? Those are your pelvic floor muscles. With a little practice you will quickly be able to squeeze them without peeing. As soon as you do that you will be ready to work them out.

Grab an App and get going

There are a number of really good phone apps (free) that run your Kegel work out with you. So just download one and get going doing them daily. The best thing is that you can do them anywhere. Whilst on the bus, on the train, whilst driving.

So get going!

Knock ‘em out daily, and start having better sex!

Break the Routine for Better Sex

EdBennett — Wed, 17 Feb 2016 21:39:39 +0000

17 Feb 2016 - 21:39 | Tags: good sex guide, australian sex habits, sex advice

For most of us sex happens in the same places. There may be more than one, but often we cycle between the same settings, and even the same times of day as well. As humans we are creatures of habit, once we learn that something both works for us and i good we tend to stick within those bounds. We all know it, its called our comfort zone. This is not a bad thing by any means. One of the core requirements to reach orgasm is lack of stress, and familiarity brings with it a bucket load of confidence, which can easily help to translate to a really good time in bed!!

That being said, there this can also kill excitement, and exciting sex is really important. The more you sleep with someone the harder it is to create – but fear not! You can always generate exciting sexy time! So where can you start?

Break the location routine:

An easy way of making it exciting is to alter the location. If you are nervous about doing this, you can easily do this by simply changing the room in your house in which you are having sex. By keeping it still in your house you remain partially inside your comfort zone, however a simple change of room can be enough to jolt you both into really waking up and being in the moment. This is really what it is about as well in the foundation – being in the moment.

Once you are comfortable with this, try and think about really different places you can get laid, ideally where you have never done it before. Are you inside? Outside? In a hotel? Away from where you like on a weekend away? At work? Don’t restrict yourself to only thinking conventionally as well. I once had sex inside a cupboard in order to mix things up – and damn that was great! Any change can do it!

Break the time routine:

I put this second because it is the harder one. Alter the time at which you have sex. If you never have it in the morning, then morning sex could be really exciting – especially if you later text the person to remind them that they had slept with you that day already!!! Never had lunchtime sex?! Well I would say that now is the time! Again the important thing is simply that you *change* things.

Break the position routine

The sexual position you use can massively change how much you and she enjoys the session. It is very different for different people. So for some people they really like to be able to look into the other person’s eyes in order to visually connect whilst getting their rocks off. Other people are much more sound based and feeling, so they like it from behind, and nothing turns them on more than the sounds of moaning and groaning that go with an occasional slap on the behind. I know one girl who hasn’t had a truly satisfying sex session unless she is black and blue by the end! We all like different things... and what I am encouraging you to do here is just that. Make it different.
Whatever you are not doing right now, try it. Do a position you have never done before or that you rarely do. Even if it not the “preferred” position, the change will bring with it many advantages of again bringing you back into the moment. That is really the name of the game, being in the moment. If you are struggling for ideas help is at hand! There are countless resources on the internet of different sexual positions, and if you prefer the human touch a bunch of people here on this website ready to give you direct advice. You only have to ask!

Change the mood – change *your* mood

Most of us have a certain mood we are in when we have sex. Try changing this. So if you are usually really happy and smiley then try is serious. If you are serious try it playful. If you are both of those try it intense, even a little angry or demanding. It is important to remember that you are *playing* so if the other person really doesn’t like it stop, take a reset and go back to something more comfortable. If you like telling the person beforehand that you are going to try it differently makes the change a lot safer to play out.
This one can be very powerful indeed. It is a tricky one and requires you to both remember that you are playing around, and to be sensitive to the other person whilst trying it. If you are nervous – get them on board with it. I have a standing agreement with my lady that one day if we have a really intense argument she is allowed to slap me really hard as long as I get to have angry sex with her afterwards. I have no idea how that is going to work out when it happens; the important thing is to be open to trying different things out. You never know what will be fun till you do it.
By the way – did I mention to bear in mind that you are playing ;-)

Experiment and be bold!

This is the best advice I can give you over all. Experiment and be bold with your choices. If you think something would be fun, just try it. Remember, if you are being spontaneous and in the moment, the other person will not be able to help themselves from getting caught up in the moment and coming along for the ride, especially if it is your idea. Everyone loves it when it is the other person’s idea because then they take no responsibility, they get to just relax and enjoy themselves. For you – the best part of taking responsibility is that you get to do the things that you would really like to do.

So be bold, be brave, and mix things up!