F-Buddy.com - fetish

Don’t be Afraid of Your Fetish

EdBennett — Fri, 17 Jul 2020 09:24:58 +0000

17 Jul 2020 - 10:24 | Tags: fetish, kink, casual sex

Are you:
- Turned on by pregnant women?
- Aroused by feet?
- Constantly thinking about how you would tie up your partner and spank them until they scream?

If one of these fetishes sounds like you, call 0800 - … just kidding. If one of these fetishes sounds like you, don’t worry. Everyone has a kink whether they’ve discovered it or not. It might be as simple as enjoying sex more by an open fire. It might be as complicated as licking someone’s feet from under their desk whilst masturbating. Whatever your fetish may be, we’re here to help and to tell you that you shouldn’t be afraid. You are not alone. The trick is learning how to safely explore your fetish without it affecting the rest of your life.

How to explore your fetish safely

Talk to your partner
It sounds so simple when put like this, but you really do need to talk to your partner about what it is you want to do. If you don’t then you’re going to get frustrated and they’re going to be confused with your demeanour. It’s not fair on either party. Here are several ways you can approach it depending on your social status.

1. The Direct Approach
If you’re not good at working your way up to things and are a more ‘take it or leave it’ kind of person, then you should start with this approach. It will make you feel more comfortable in talking about your kink and this will translate into your body language. You will also come off as less passive-aggressive. It will also determine sooner rather than later as to whether or not your partner is on board.

2. Working your way up
A bit like extended foreplay this; working your way up to talking about it only works if you’re not a very direct person. Don’t wait too long to tell your partner as they may have already formed a completely different opinion of your sexuality. Be candid and honest and answer any questions they have to the best of your ability.

3. Passive-Aggressive
I do not recommend this at all, but it needs to be mentioned as some people don’t know how else to operate. If you can’t discuss your kink by either of the other two methods then you will most likely use the ‘if you really like me’ approach with your partner. Again I do not recommend it, but people are different and we must cater to all tastes. You’re much better off using either the direct or indirect approach.

Sexual Fetishes

EdBennett — Sun, 12 Nov 2017 14:56:28 +0000

12 Nov 2017 - 14:56 | Tags: sexual fetishes, fetish, sex fantasies

Sexual fetishes are a fascinating subject to most of us. We are not only interested in what we want in the bedroom (or outside the bedroom, or in a lift, or in public depending on your fetish!). We are also fascinated by what other people are into. We love hearing about other people’s sex lives, and we see this in all aspects of our society. We see it on television, with story lines focused and revolving around peoples sex lives, relationships. We see this in the office, where the most gossiped thing is the latest movement of whom is having sex with whom. We also spend a lot of time and energy focused on it. The dating and casual dating industry is huge, with vast amounts of money being poured into the process of helping people to find partners, hook ups, fuck buddies and other one night stands. We also sell most of our products through sex, whether that is clothing, ice cream or shoes… all of them are being sold on the basis that if you buy this you are going to have more sex. We are sex obsessed, of that there is no doubt!

What is a Fetish

A fetish is something without which a person cannot be sexually satisfied. It is more than something they simply like, or a sexual preference, it is something that they need to have. So for example, if someone had a “high heel shoe” fetish, without the presence of high heel shoes, that person would not be able to get turned on and be sexually satisfied.

The more day to day use of fetish

Now that the word is being used more day to day, it is no longer as extreme. A fetish has ceased to be something that someone needs, and has become more something that we simply want to have. Most people who say that they have a foot fetish do not really have a 100% fetish, they just really like feet and get turned on by them. This level of fetish is what most people are referring to when they say that they have a “fetsish”.

Embrace your fetishes

Many people ignore or surpress their fetishes. I think that you should embrace them! If there is something that is going to turn you on, to make your orgasm deeper and longer, that makes you hot and horney, you should gran that with both hands. No one can really make you come if you do not know how to come yourself, so you have to be turned on already. Help yourself and your partner out. If you have a fetish, share it with them and embrace it!

Is There a Problem With Vanilla Sex?

EdBennett — Sat, 05 Sep 2015 10:15:30 +0000

5 Sep 2015 - 11:15 | Tags: vanilla sex, casual sex, kinky sex, BDSM, bondage, fetish

To say that someone is ‘kinky’ or ‘vanilla’ is to ignore the wide and varied world of fetishes and sexual preferences nestled under the umbrella term of ‘kinky’. Simply put, it’s hard to say someone is truly vanilla or kinky. Everyone is different and everyone has different ways to enjoy their sexuality. Just because you enjoy being spanked does not mean you are into BDSM. Just because you enjoy having sex in the missionary position, does not mean you only enjoy having vanilla sex. As a culture, humans are obsessed with labelling things. You have to fit one label or another or we simply just don’t understand your position. It is no different when it comes to enjoying sex.

No problems here!

Supporters of BDSM and supporters of Vanilla sex have an unfortunate habit of trying to defend their positions and attack any opposing views. I went to a Japanese rope tying class a few years ago led by a legendary instructor. He was a really nice guy who earns his living from teaching and demonstrating the art of Japanese Shibari. Loosely translated it is rope tying for pleasure. He took us all through the basic beginner knots and had us practice on one another, which was quite funny. He also showed us a couple of his videos where he has travelled the world practising his art with various other performers. Make no mistake; what this man does is an art.

However, there came a point in the class where we were all discussing the various preferences and methods people use to enjoy sex. We got onto the topic of vanilla sex – a term that the instructor himself used – and its application worldwide. It was clear to anyone in the room that he did not have much time for vanilla sex, which is fine obviously. To each his own. What I do remember quite clearly however is the tone he employed when talking about vanilla sex. Dismissive, negative and at one point sneering. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think he meant anything by it. He just said what he was feeling. However he failed to take into account that there are millions of people around the world who enjoy vanilla sex just as much as he enjoys kinky sex.

Room for both

What I learned in that class was that we all need to be a little more understanding of each other when it comes to sex. I might like vanilla sex over kinky sex. You might prefer BDSM to vanilla. What we must not do – and what we are all guilty of at one point or another – is to judge one another based on our sexual preferences. Just because someone does not enjoy BDSM does not mean they are worth less sexually than someone who does.

Do we all have a kink?

EdBennett — Thu, 25 Jun 2015 16:12:26 +0000

25 Jun 2015 - 17:12 | Tags: kink, kinky sex, casual sex, fetish

It’s the question that a lot of people want to ask, but hardly anyone tries to answer; do I have a kink? There are many reasons you never get an answer. You’re too embarrassed to think about it, you think you’re the only person in the world who feels the way you do…etc etc. Hopefully you’re smart enough to know that you are not alone at all. Everyone has different sexual preferences and many people have what we call ‘kinks’. First of all it’s worth clarifying what we mean by ‘kink’. Basically having a kink is having a sexual fetish of some sort. Basically it encompasses anything that is unconventional about sex (since when is sex so conventional anyway?). This could be anything from being blindfolded to wanting to lick cream off your partner’s feet. Kinks are wide and varied.

Do I have a kink?
Only you can answer that question. Just because you enjoy sex in different places and positions doesn’t mean you have a kink. That said, just because you enjoy being blindfolded and tied to the bed doesn’t mean you necessarily have a kink – so many people use blindfolds and ropes now that it can be argued it has become conventional. If you like dressing up and role playing whilst having your sex partner spank you with a paddle, you might have a kink.

Is it bad if I don’t have a kink?
No. Just because kinky sex is all the rage at the moment doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. You can still just enjoy sex for sex. You don’t have to find a whip, chains or anything else in order to enjoy sex. In fact you’ll find practitioners of kink will be jealous of your ability to just enjoy sex for sex’s sake. They might hide it behind a veneer of sympathy and arrogance, but they will admit that they miss the rush of just being able to have sex without the need to dress up, spank or tie up.

Do we all have a kink?
Well like we said at the start, only you can answer that one. If you do have a kink, great! If you don’t that’s great too!

Why Fifty Shades is Bad for Bondage

EdBennett — Tue, 17 Feb 2015 11:10:00 +0000

17 Feb 2015 - 11:10 | Tags: BDSM, Fifty Shades bad, fetish, kink

The release of the hotly anticipated movie of the badly written book about bondage is here! In it you’ll find:

• Unrealistic depictions of BDSM!
• A plot line that tries to make women think it’s okay for a guy to hurt them as long as they’ve signed a consent form
• Lessons teaching young women that men will run away unless you let them hurt you

What. The. Fuck?!

Awful
Yep. Fifty Shades (I read it!) really does contain all the material I mention above and more! Experience awful dialogue! Repetition of the same words and phrases again and again and again…and again! What’s really disturbing though is that the film will make a colossal amount of money despite sensible people knowing that it’s shit and does not portray BDSM in a realistic way at all.

BDSM
Any practitioner of BDSM will laugh and shake their head at Fifty Shades of Grey. Not only do the sex scenes illustrate a woman clearly not comfortable with the situation (author note: subs give permission and a dominant is not allowed to practice if the sub ever says ‘NO’), but they portray BDSM as a very stilted tired sex act.

It manages to:

• Portray Christian Grey as ‘sick’ because he likes BDSM
• Shows Grey is actually a light weight when it comes to BDSM
• Ignores the fact that most practitioners of BDSM don’t use cable ties because they’re dangerous. Soft ropes are preferred.

If we could recall every copy of Fifty Shades of Grey and sit down with the author and teach her what BDSM is actually about and that people who practise it aren’t ‘sick’ or ‘psychologically twisted’ then the book might actually be worth reading and the film watching.

Sad Truth
Unfortunately many women have already read the book and seen the film and no doubt many more will. But if you are interested in going to see the film, please bear in mind that it is not an accurate or realistic depiction of BDSM or the people who practise it in any way shape or form. The characters in the story are about as interesting as two planks of wood and if you’re looking to learn more about BDSM, you’d be better off finding a fuck buddy on the site here who actually practices it safely and sexily. Unlike Fifty Shades of Grey.

How to try bondage for the first time

EdBennett — Mon, 19 Jan 2015 14:14:01 +0000

19 Jan 2015 - 14:14 | Tags: 1st time bondage, fetish, bondage, casual sex

“I want you to tie me up and do me hard!”

Those words are often music to a man’s ears! But what if you’ve never tried bondage before? You have no idea how your partner wants you to tie them up. You have no idea how they want you to ‘do them’ once you’ve tied them up. What if you cut off their circulation? What if they laugh at you once they see how awful your rope tying skills are? All these questions have plagues every man’s mind whenever the subject of bondage is brought up and they’ve never tried it.

Conquer your fears
Bondage is nothing to be afraid of. Done correctly it can be one of the most erotically powerful sexual acts you can share with a partner. All you need is a little spirit and a sense of humour when you first try it. As long as you have these two things, you’ll be fine. So here’s a quick-fire guide on how to try it for the first time.

1. Make sure you’ve got the right material
Christian Grey might be all the rage but you need to make sure that if you decide to use a tie to tie your lady up, it better be the right kind of tie. You can buy specially made bondage ties online and in sex shops.

2. Try restraints the first time
If you’re not too hot on your rope tying skills, you can always buy a special bondage kit complete with bed restraints and handcuffs. This will allow you to explore your domination fantasies without the fear of you or your partner laughing.

3. Book yourself onto a rope tying class
It’s worth investigating these classes. You can usually find one in your local area – yes bondage has become very popular in the past decade – and the instructors will ensure all your fears are addressed in a safe and fun environment. More importantly they’ll give you the confidence to try rope tying yourself and teach you that it’s okay if you don’t get it right the first time.

4. Start off light and see where it goes
It’s important to remember that sex is always supposed to be fun. Bondage is a part of the performance that can greatly aid sex if done right. Don’t try anything too complicated the first time you give bondage a go. Start light and see where the night takes you.