F-Buddy.com - casual sex rules

Is there more than 1 type of Casual Sex?

EdBennett — Thu, 28 May 2015 10:57:20 +0000

28 May 2015 - 11:57 | Tags: casual sex, f-buddy, casual sex rules of engagement, casual sex rules

According to www.divinecaroline.com there are at least 13 different types of casual sex. Whilst I let your mind race away with you about what they could be, let me begin by saying the chances are you’ve probably had at least several types of different casual sex. Gone are the days where sex was confined to the marital bed and the often-happened-never-discussed extra-marital affair. It’s now 2015 and casual sex has been making great strides in the past decade. In the US a magazine reported that people across the states are far more relaxed about casual sex than they were a year ago. The same is reported around several other countries across the globe including Ireland and the UK.

But just what types of casual sex are there?

The different types of casual sex
Hold onto yourself (within reason). Here are the 13 types reported:

1. Rec Sex
2. Booty Call Sex
3. Appointment Sex
4. Ex-Sex
5. Cereal Sex
6. Deja Sex
7. Drive-through Sex
8. Mercy Sex
9. Comfort Sex
10. Occasion Sex
11. Palate Cleansing Sex
12. Temp Sex
13. Hate Sex

Did you get all that? Good, because my head’s still reeling from some of the summaries. It took me a while to figure out what mercy sex was. When I realised it basically meant having sex with someone you’re not really attracted to but feel sorry for, I shamefully realised I’ve done that. Comfort sex everyone has done: sex after a bad break up. You just want to feel the warmth of another body. It doesn’t really matter who’s it is. However just like a cheeseburger or kebab, it might feel good at the time, but you end up feeling a bit shit in the morning.

Cereal sex was another one I got confused about, but then I realised it’s just a clever name for one night stands: delicious and filling for about an hour but then you realise you’re still hungry a few hours later. Deja Sex was another one I got confused about, until I explored further and realised it’s basically sex with someone you weren’t planning on having sex with again. A few drinks later and you’re in bed together.

My eyes are opened…
So there you have it. Even if you don’t think you’ve engaged in casual sex, the chances are you have but just haven’t realised it at the time. Nothing to be embarrassed about – I didn’t realise I’d had Palate Cleansing sex until recently.

Casual Sex: How to protect your feelings

EdBennett — Mon, 13 Apr 2015 10:13:57 +0000

13 Apr 2015 - 11:13 | Tags: casual sex rules, emotions and casual sex, casual sex, fuck buddies

Despite what millions of porn videos and films would have us believe, it is not that simple to distance emotion from sex. We’re all human beings and as human beings, we feel things. It only takes one little negative reply or text to get even the most jaded cynical person in the world crying into their hanky like a little boy. We bolster ourselves up and convince ourselves that we will never become the person who gets hurt in a casual hook up or romance. Yet we almost always do. The rare exceptions are those people completely incapable of opening themselves up to feeling. They try to purge their emotions but in so doing only end up hurting themselves. It doesn’t have to be like that though. Here are a few clever ways you can protect your feelings and still enjoy casual sex.

1. Go With the Flow
If you hook up with someone, have sex with them and find you liked them enough to do it again, do it. Let yourself be swept up into the excitement of having sex with a new person. Don’t run away from it if they want to see you again and if you want to see them again. Just see how it goes. Casual sex comes with an expiration date one way or the other so try not to worry about it.

2. Don’t over-think your texts
The worst thing people do in casual sex is to over think what they write in a text message. Instead of spending hours wondering how to let a fuck buddy you want to see them again, just tell them. If they don’t they won’t. If they like you they will. Just go with it.

3. Consider if Casual Sex is for you
We’d be stupid to say that casual sex is for everyone. Some people enjoy it, some people don’t. The trick is in knowing which person you are and the only way to find that out is to experiment with it. Have some casual sex and see how you feel. If you find you enjoy it, then by all means continue to enjoy it. If you don’t like it, you don’t have to do it again.

4. Be Clear and Honest with your partners
The big mistake most people engaging in casual sex make is not being honest with their partners about what they want and how they feel. It’s unfair not to let someone you’re having sex with know how you’re feeling. Be honest from the outset. You can hurt yourself and your fuck buddies if you aren’t.

5. Watch the Regularity
This seems a counterintuitive remark considering we encouraged you to go with the flow, but it’s important not to become too accustomed to sex with the same person in casual relationships. The whole point of casual sex is that it’s casual. Hooking up once every couple of weeks is fine, but the more regular the hook up, the more chance one or both of you have of getting attached becomes. Humans are natural bonding creatures. That’s not a bad thing. But if you’re looking just for casual sex, you really don’t want to be sleeping with the same person on a very regular basis.

Casual Sex: Problems for Women

EdBennett — Thu, 05 Feb 2015 12:43:55 +0000

5 Feb 2015 - 12:43 | Tags: casual sex problems, casual sex issues, casual sex problems for women, casual sex rules

Like it or not, there is still a stigma attached to having casual sex when you’re a woman. Whereas guys who sleep around are often treated like heroes or shrugged off as ‘well boys will be boys’, women who talk about having lots of casual sex are demonized. It’s unfair and I hope that one day not long from now, this stigma will disappear along with a lot of other medieval tripe about sex. Aside from the stigma though, women have to deal with more anxieties and worries about casual sex than men. Below are some of the top things women often deal with when having casual sex.

1. Constantly anxious over STD test results
Fact of the matter is even when using a condom, men and women always get nervous over a test result when sleeping around.

2. Not wearing the best underwear
Casual sex is often unexpected, so there’s nothing worse than being caught out wearing an old pair of granny panties. Not cool.

3. Nervous about being pregnant even though you use condoms and are on the pill
That fear never goes away no matter how careful you are. As guys we’ve got it far easier than women!

4. When a guy wants to cuddle after
I'm happy to dispel the myth that all women want to cuddle after sex. They don’t. If it’s casual sex and you’re having a cuddle, it’s not casual sex. Women know this better than men.

5. Having friends insult you
They don’t mean to, but women often criticize their own friends for having casual sex…even though they used to do it as well before they found ‘Mr Perfect’. Vomit inducing.

6. Forgetting the guy’s name
When you’re sleeping with different guys it’s hard to remember everyone’s name. Guys do it too when sleeping around. Pretty even keel on this one.

7. Having to change bed linen frequently
When you’re in a relationship you don’t care as much, but when you’re sleeping with different people there’s nothing worse than having reminders of your last conquest all over the sheets before your next one turns up.

8. Awkward conversation after
You’ve both just had great sex, but for some reason the guy starts a conversation. Er…no. You’re there for sex. Not conversation. Just sex.

9. Being on your period
Again as guys we just don’t understand how much more complicated casual sex can be logistically for a woman. When you’re ‘on’ sex is the last thing on your mind.

10. Body Hair maintenance
Guys don’t really care about their own hair…and to be honest we don’t care too much about yours as long as we get sex. But we do admit that women think more about their bikini lines and arm pits then us. Why? Because that’s what dumb ass society dictates.

The Green Eyed Monster: Jealously

EdBennett — Sat, 17 Jan 2015 10:12:19 +0000

17 Jan 2015 - 10:12 | Tags: casual sex jealously, casual sex rules

So you’ve been busy having sex with one or several fellow buddies. It feels great! You’re getting laid regularly and feel like a King or Queen as you walk down the street. No one knows how to strut like you! Then all of a sudden you have a night in and you casually text your buddy. You ask if they’re free for a little fun later on. You get a reply saying ‘sorry no I’m busy later’. You feel a little taken aback all of a sudden. You start asking questions. What could be so important for your fuck buddy not to want to spend a few fun hours having sex with you? What could they possibly be doing that is better? Who could they possibly be seeing who is better than you?

That’s how jealously in a casual relationship begins.

How to conquer jealously in open relationships
Don’t feel bad if you recognize yourself in these questions. We’ve all been there. We’ve all wondered what someone we’ve been having sex with is up to right now. We all know that we shouldn’t be jealous if we knew from the outset that it is just casual sex. But guess what? We also know that we’re only human and sex is one of the most intimate things humans can share. It’s no wonder that jealously will rear its ugly head. So how do we stop it?

1. Recognize and acknowledge it
Ignoring your jealously is a sure fire way to kill casual sex dead. Your partner won’t be interested in your sudden mood changes. They will just move on to someone else. Recognizing and acknowledging the jealously is the first step in dealing with it

2. Talk about it
Sounds scary, but discussing your feelings with your fuck buddy is worth doing for several reasons. If they don’t feel the same way then it’s good that they know how you feel and you can walk away before you get hurt. If they do feel the same way then you are now both aware of each other’s boundaries.

3. Walk away if you can’t handle it
If you feel the jealously is affecting your casual relationships then walk away for a bit. Do something else. Enjoy other aspects of your life. Then when you feel ready to try it again you can always come back to it.

4. Don’t ever ignore it
Ignore jealously at your peril! It has a habit of wrecking your life and relationships – not just the casual ones.

Jealously is something that can bleed into other areas of your life before you even recognize the damage it causes. Make sure you’re self aware enough to know the signs and do something about it.